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| A flirty black "Chemise" |
Finally, some guidelines for making the right choices for your honey.
First, shop at Spark where only mannequins are used to display garments!!!
Chances are the T-shirt and shorts your wife wears to bed are comfy, but certainly not sexy. A gentleman once said that his now ex-wife used to sleep in turtlenecks. Okay, I think we all agree that’s not sexy lingerie. A lady once bought a chopper bra to wear on her husband’s birthday. The next day she squealed with delight as she recounted his reaction. Clearly, that was sexy lingerie for him. Her husband, in kind, surprised her by wearing a thong for her on her birthday. She did not find it sexy at all! The first lesson in lingerie is that what's sexy is in the eye of the beholder. He may have done better with a new bottle of flavored warming lotion!
One person can find a garment like crotchless panties sexy while someone else will find them disgusting. One may find sheer lingerie sexy while another prefers lace. So, how does a godly husband navigate this sexy lingerie minefield when trying to buy their wife a sexy piece of lingerie? Here are a few guidelines.
First, black is always safe. The color is sexy, but also slimming. Everyone feels good in black. Next, err on the more conservative side with your first purchase. Don’t start with chopper bras and crotchless panties. You are sending her the wrong message. Sexy, beautiful, desired, precious... those are the messages you want to send.
Begin with a sexy yet pretty negligee with lace and matching panties. Hands down, the Number One pick: a Babydoll. It's always sexy and makes everyone feel beautiful when they wear it... which is KEY for any lady to feel sexy and "in the mood". Based on the reaction and feedback to this gift, you can move up the risqué meter to more sheer and more revealing items. And, of course, there is wet look (looks like latex or rubber), but that should come later.
What to Look for When Shopping
It’s a lot easier if you know her sizes. If you don’t, take a look in her lingerie drawer and check the label on a bra—the size should be right there—34B, 38C, something like that. Panties are in sizes usually from XS through XXXXXL. Sometimes they’re numerical, ranging from about 5-28. Plus size ladies sizing is available at Spark! You might also take a peak at fabric types and colors and patterns (like leopard or floral)— especially on items she wears all the time.
Now you’ve got the critical info— what to buy? Well, if you see quite a few of the same styles (babydoll, chemise, corset, etc), you can take it up a notch and choose a luxury item in that style. Or, how about buying her something you know she won’t buy for herself? Some suggest that thongs are the most comfortable panties ever, but some women disagree. Some won’t even try them. Let her try them out on your dime.
If you absolutely can’t find her sizes, you’ve got a few choices: guess and hope for the best (we don't recommend this), ask her outright, or buy something not quite as dependent on fit, like a silk nightgown or slinky robe. Spark This Marriage are very forgiving on sizing and almost always have a size range for a garment. This makes it easier to buy and feel comfortable with your choice of size. Don't forget that you can always get some edible lotion or tasty massage oil. These always "fit". ;)
Of course you’d like something you want to see her in, but if it’s too gimmicky or plain uncomfortable she might wear it for you, but it won’t leave the drawer more than a few times a year—and that's probably being generous. The key is to choose something that will let her know you think she’s special, but will also be comfortable for her. She needs to see herself as gorgeous or it just does not work. Many women are so hung up about body image that they don’t realize that, to the men who love them, they are hot, hot, hot. So if you bought her a blender for the holidays or her birthday, this is the time to go all out and show her how she looks in your eyes. (Caution- make sure you show her that it is not the lingerie that is sexy- it's HER. Lingerie is just the wrapping on her! Spark has great wrapping!)
If you would REALLY like to spoil her, get her a gift certificate for a larger dollar amount than you would have spent. Let her go crazy and and indulge instread of trying to save money. Spark This Marriage has electronic gift certificates for your marriage.
co-authored by T.E.
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